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I'm now running the Timberwolves PR department...

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2023 10:53 am
by AbeVigodaLive
I mean it's a pretty good job and everything. But don't get me wrong, I'm not a revolutionary PR savant or anything. In fact, as I told the team, we're pretty much taking a paint-by-numbers approach to dealing with Year 1 of the Connelly regime.

Why Every Timberwolves Fan Should Be Optimistic About Next Season

- Towns and Gobert are just learning how to play together. Between Town's illness, Gobert's responsibilities for team France, and then Towns' injury... and now Gobert's back injury... things could still work out perfectly on the court! 21 games aren't enough. 28 games aren't enough. One playoff series isn't enough. Imagine how good we'll be after a training camp together! Just give us one more season, please.

- Man, that Kyle Anderson pickup was smart, huh?

- It's so hard for star players to be traded. Poor Gobert had to move across the country after a decade in Utah. It's like super hard to win immediately in a new place as THE guy. And maybe he was hurt all season? Or worn down from playing last summer? Or, ummm... homesick? Chicken pox? All possibilities, right?

- The team has so many 2nd round draft picks. Those are just like 1st round draft picks, only better! Tim Connelly is known for finding developmental projects and turning all of them into Nikola Jokic. Patience friends.

- McDaniels is injured. Just imagine how good we'd be with Jaden McDaniels. You do realize that we'd have been able to land Rudy Gobert for only one draft pick, Walker Kessler and maybe Malik Beasley if we would have thrown in Scottie Pippen 2.0, right? He's gonna be a star. Or maybe, possibly, the next Jerami Grant type if all goes well. Just give us one more season, please.

- Edwards is hurt. He's had to do it all, and that's worn him down. Poor kid. But you just wait... the HUGE leap is coming in year 4. Or maybe year 5 at the latest. Definitely by year 6. Geez, Minnesotans should know by now that elite players just need a bit more time to develop and a bit more money to incentivize them.

- All we need is a backup PG. And Tim Connelly will surely find one who we will all clamor over after one of the new guy's classic 5 points and 6 assists masterpieces next year. Just give us one more season, please.

- Man, that DLO for Conley trade was smart, huh?

- All we need is a better playoff matchup. It's so unfortunate that we worked our tails off but were stuck in the #8 seed. Bad luck on that one. Just give us one more season to work our way into more favorable seeding, please.

- Man, that Kyle Anderson pickup was smart, huh?

- Ummm... this one is dicey. But have you ever thought it might not be Gobert? Maybe... now we don't want to point fingers or anything... but sometimes a new voice in the locker room can bring a masterfully built roster together. Just saying, every other team would jump at the chance to pay all that stuff for Rudy Gobert. Just saying, him playing worse might not be from him having a perfect system crafted for him in Utah and him being a terrible fit with all new players and systems in MN. Maybe it's time for a dreaded coaching change. I know we've been through this many times and many ways here in Minnesota, but remember how good it worked out last time? Chris Finch is so much better than Ryan Saunders! Obviously, there are many other guys better than Chris Finch. We just need a coach on the same page as management. It's gonna fix everything. Just a little patience, please.

- For those who don't buy the first bullet, no worries. You know, that Towns guy just isn't living up to his end of the deal. Now granted, he might have just been re-signed by the current regime, and we're not known as a hasty bunch known for making knee-jerk decisions (ahem), but we expected so much more from him. His latest transgressions hit us out of left field. Imagine all the great players we'd get if we traded him.

- For those who don't buy the last bullet, no worries. You know, sometimes players just don't live up to their end of the deal. Now granted, we brought in Rudy Gobert on a historically one-sided deal while bidding against nobody else... but that's on Rudy Gobert and not us. We were hoodwinked into a bill of goods. Imagine all the great players we'd get if we traded him.

- Man, that DLO for Conley trade was smart, huh?

- That Kyle Anderson sure is something, right?

No worries, friends. This season was a fluke. All is fine.

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Re: I'm now running the Timberwolves PR department...

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2023 11:03 am
by Papalrep
BRING BACK GERSON!!!!

Re: I'm now running the Timberwolves PR department...

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2023 2:10 pm
by Monster
Abe you are fired. You never even brought up Josh Minott or Luka Garza. Maybe you can work for the Tommy Mayonnaise spreaders in the sandwich league.

Re: I'm now running the Timberwolves PR department...

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2023 2:49 pm
by AbeVigodaLive
Monster wrote: Mon Apr 17, 2023 2:10 pm Abe you are fired. You never even brought up Josh Minott or Luka Garza. Maybe you can work for the Tommy Mayonnaise spreaders in the sandwich league.


Don't fret, Pile.

We have Jonny Krawsckwycyxynski waiting in the wings... word processor at the ready... primed to write a glowing article about Tim Connelly's track record (as I noted) turning 2nd round picks into Nikola Jokic.

The article will speak glowingly of Garza's scoring prowess (26.8 points per 36 minutes) and Josh's stellar rebounding and block rates.

We got you covered, brother.




[Note: And I'm never working with Tommy Mayonnaise again. That guy is a thief and a liar.]

Re: I'm now running the Timberwolves PR department...

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2023 5:14 pm
by Monster
AbeVigodaLive wrote: Mon Apr 17, 2023 2:49 pm
Monster wrote: Mon Apr 17, 2023 2:10 pm Abe you are fired. You never even brought up Josh Minott or Luka Garza. Maybe you can work for the Tommy Mayonnaise spreaders in the sandwich league.


Don't fret, Pile.

We have Jonny Krawsckwycyxynski waiting in the wings... word processor at the ready... primed to write a glowing article about Tim Connelly's track record (as I noted) turning 2nd round picks into Nikola Jokic.

The article will speak glowingly of Garza's scoring prowess (26.8 points per 36 minutes) and Josh's stellar rebounding and block rates.

We got you covered, brother.




[Note: And I'm never working with Tommy Mayonnaise again. That guy is a thief and a liar.]
Don’t forget to put in an article about how Denver was a bad matchup because Ryan Saunders was on Denver’s staff and he knew all the intricacies of how to defend and or frustrate Towns. I think you need to hire me as a PR consultant. I’m done giving you my value away for free but TRUST me I have piles more.

Re: I'm now running the Timberwolves PR department...

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2023 10:18 pm
by LongGame
First post, long time lurker, so take it with a grain of salt. I am optimistic about the future, regardless of how the season ends. Ant and McDaniels are great building blocks. The Rudy trade was a mistake, but there is no reason to dwell on it. Rudy still has significant value as a starter on our team or in a trade (albeit nowhere near what we gave up). I think we have a big decision on KAT (not sure on trade restrictions, etc..). He is an amazing talent, but is clearly missing something that allows him to realize his potential. Hopefully we either help him figure out that “something” or trade him now while his value is high. Bringing in players like Anderson, Prince and NAW are huge. Developing players like Vanderbilt, Naz, Jordan, Nowell and hopefully Josh will be key. Love Conley and he plays younger than his years, but will need to find his replacement in the near future (would love to trade KAT for a stud young PF and PG and maybe picks depending on how good they are; keeping KAT is the safer option as our floor will remain pretty high with health and the current roster). I don’t think we are done this season, but it doesn’t look good right now. I just don’t find it particularly productive for fans to spend a disproportionate amount of their time criticizing past mistakes with the benefit of hindsight. For the record, I would be the richest man alive with the benefit of hindsight. I would like to spend more time focused on securing the future so maybe I am destined for the Timberwolves PR department ;)

Re: I'm now running the Timberwolves PR department...

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2023 10:27 pm
by 60WinTim
I like it, LongGame! Did you have a username on Enjin? Or just a lurker?!? ;)

Re: I'm now running the Timberwolves PR department...

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2023 10:29 pm
by LongGame
Thought about calling myself 70WinTim, but just a lurker ;) (to be clear, I am not Tim Connelly nor is my name Tim, just optimistic).

Re: I'm now running the Timberwolves PR department...

Posted: Tue Apr 18, 2023 7:05 am
by AbeVigodaLive
LongGame wrote: Mon Apr 17, 2023 10:18 pm First post, long time lurker, so take it with a grain of salt. I am optimistic about the future, regardless of how the season ends. Ant and McDaniels are great building blocks. The Rudy trade was a mistake, but there is no reason to dwell on it. Rudy still has significant value as a starter on our team or in a trade (albeit nowhere near what we gave up). I think we have a big decision on KAT (not sure on trade restrictions, etc..). He is an amazing talent, but is clearly missing something that allows him to realize his potential. Hopefully we either help him figure out that “something” or trade him now while his value is high. Bringing in players like Anderson, Prince and NAW are huge. Developing players like Vanderbilt, Naz, Jordan, Nowell and hopefully Josh will be key. Love Conley and he plays younger than his years, but will need to find his replacement in the near future (would love to trade KAT for a stud young PF and PG and maybe picks depending on how good they are; keeping KAT is the safer option as our floor will remain pretty high with health and the current roster). I don’t think we are done this season, but it doesn’t look good right now. I just don’t find it particularly productive for fans to spend a disproportionate amount of their time criticizing past mistakes with the benefit of hindsight. For the record, I would be the richest man alive with the benefit of hindsight. I would like to spend more time focused on securing the future so maybe I am destined for the Timberwolves PR department ;)


Totally agree.


And as head of PR, we're going to showcase the 83 people who thought the Gobert deal was a good trade to shout out the 23,473,210 negative nellie naysayers who called it a bad trade immediately.

Re: I'm now running the Timberwolves PR department...

Posted: Tue Apr 18, 2023 12:35 pm
by Wolvesfan21
Hey we have a better chance (350-1 vegas odds = 1 dollar bet pays 350) of winning the NBA Championship then winning the Powerball (1 in 292,201,338). Shits looking pretty good to me!

Good PR! :D